the_carl wrote:All the good girls need to stop being taken and/or lesbians. Like I started volunteering at this neighborhood cleanup thing on saturdays because this hot chick worked there, but then it turns out she's got a long-term live-in boyfriend. And she's all like, man, you've got so much in common with my brother, you guys she totally be friends. I DON'T WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOUR BROTHER I WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU AND THEN WE MAYBE WE BANG AND STUFF KK?
I'm sorry but I laughed really hard at this. Mostly because I read it like you were doing stand-up.
Seriously though it sucks and that's when you flirt it up/become best friends and get the bf jealous, which annoys the girl and causes the demise of their relationship. In theory. Didn't work for me, but you never know.
Apparently some dude named blake is more fuckable than i am. Blake. Like if any of your names are blake its cool but like.....Jamie is a better name. When i find you blake your suffering will be legendary. You have no idea who youve just started a pissing war with. Telling a girl she isnt "Allowed to talk" to me is daring me to fuck that pussy in your face you complete bitch boy. I hope you have fun watching me mop the floor with your "girlfriend". As if she didnt tell me she was "in love" with me not a couple days ago. Im going to make you regret ever asserting yourself. When im done with you youll be wearing maxipads.
Joe Gress wrote:
The last time someone offered a pretzel burger without mustard the fucking Holocaust happened.
Work has been so awful tonight god damn. I just wanna sleep.
THEBEERHAMMER wrote:Apparently some dude named blake is more fuckable than i am. Blake. Like if any of your names are blake its cool but like.....Jamie is a better name. When i find you blake your suffering will be legendary. You have no idea who youve just started a pissing war with. Telling a girl she isnt "Allowed to talk" to me is daring me to fuck that pussy in your face you complete bitch boy. I hope you have fun watching me mop the floor with your "girlfriend". As if she didnt tell me she was "in love" with me not a couple days ago. Im going to make you regret ever asserting yourself. When im done with you youll be wearing maxipads.
I feel like this is could be a monolouge from the R-rated version of Mean Girls.
D.o.S. wrote:I'm fucking stupid and no one should operate under any other premise.
Hes ugly too. Like i dont mind that this chick is fucking someone else....but who the fuck do you think you are telling someone they arent allowed to talk to me?
Joe Gress wrote:
The last time someone offered a pretzel burger without mustard the fucking Holocaust happened.
waiting with great nervousness to hear from a woman i've been talking with online, and fighting a losing battle with the urge to buy another Musima guitar from East Germany. i'm gonna have to sell some shit if i do this.
In girum imus nocte et consumimur igni
FIFTY YEARS OF SCARING THE CHILDREN 1970-2020--and i'm not done yet
Diabolical!
