ilovefuzz.com

This is a gear forum. Why are we on here? To avoid practising and actually getting better at our chosen instruments.

Anything you plug into will be made worse by you having wasted your time reading this, and many other similar posts.

All of that money you spent on your rig that gets gigged once a year in your friend’s buddy’s DIY gig? You could have poured that into lessons. You could, and should, be Stevie Ray Vaughan by now.

Stop reading this, sell your gear and start learning to play your instrument. Gear won’t get you Steve Lukathor’s tone! Tone is in the fingers, and your fingers need to practise.

What would Steve Vai do? Sell his gear and practise.
What would Steve Earle and other genuinely talented musicians do? Sell your fucking gear, buy heroin, skip court, do jail time, and practise.

Change your name to Steve and fear your gear.

At this stage I think it's much more likely that my pedalboard will get rid of me, than the other way around.

I’m not afraid of my gear but does anyone else worry that it’s actually sentient and every time I go to the basement to do laundry or whatever it’s like.... judging me? Like it’s thinking “oh coming down for a another beer, eh? No time to practice this week, eh?”

Or my new Peavey Butcher head (which to be fair is SO LOUD I don’t really get to crank very often is like nudging the other heads going “oh he’s down here ‘doing laundry’ again.... no time for us, eh? I used to live in a cool dry jam space and now I’m here in your trashy basement neglected and alone”

It’s not called butcher for nothing dude.

That thing will kill you.

Fucking sell it man!
And get gooder at pentatonics.

Honestly, we all know that playing the guitar is just a crutch for being shitty at body percussion and singing/howling/shrieking/crying

Being good at the guitar is a crutch for being a shitty human being. Try being a horse instead

What if your name is Stephen, Stefan, or Esteban?

i swear my tone gets worse every time i plug in my guitar

I loathe the 'be good at instrument musicianship types'. Notice how they are all shit songwriters. Also notice the greatest songs of all time are like 2 notes than watching some dork on youtube plow through scales in under 20 seconds. No melody, no emotional resonance, no transference of your hardships of life into the music. They got nothing, other than repition. Wooow, real impressive. Yeah I'll stick to my pedals and boards THANK YOU!

BRO






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BRO

can I slightly cower - be marginally good and still buy fuzz I don't need? I mean the plan is either that or running a recording of a vacuum picking up quarters through a boss fz-2 set on fire.

I played my guitar once. It went bad. Now I'm back to looking at shiny things on reverb that I can post on the 'gram.

I'm filling out the paperwork right now to change my name to Jimi-Jimmy-David-Eric-Steve-Earl. That ought to do it.

Woolworm wrote:I loathe non-cliché-hipster boring fucknuts that make the world more and more dull every day by their close-minded take on everything they don't like or get being close-minded

Fixed it for you