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Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 4:09 pm
by oinkbanana
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Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 4:32 pm
by MEC
Weren't you just about to release an album?
If so walking away without saying
anything is kind of a shitty move.
Maybe you could help find your replacement and help him/her learn your parts?
That way the album release and subsequent shows could still happen and the band doesn't end up stuck with a bunch of records and no way to sell them.
I think the band deserves some sort of explanation even if it is just "I just wasn't into it anymore".
I really believe not saying anything will create far more animosity than having a civilized discussion.
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 4:33 pm
by kbit
^Yeah, all of that.
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 4:49 pm
by smallsnd/bigsnd
what they said.
i've quit bands before and it's definitely rough... as long as you're straight up with them and tell them to their face (no phone/email/text) there shouldn't be any issues. if you've got obligations to fulfill with them (tours, etc) the best thing to do is to say, "hey, i'll finish up this last tour, but after that i'm all done." the worst thing one can do is to completely burn bridges - who knows where any of those people will wind up, who they'll talk to about you, etc.
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 4:50 pm
by D.o.S.
smallsnd/bigsnd wrote:what they said.
i've quit bands before and it's definitely rough... as long as you're straight up with them and tell them to their face (no phone/email/text) there shouldn't be any issues. if you've got obligations to fulfill with them (tours, etc) the best thing to do is to say, "hey, i'll finish up this last tour, but after that i'm all done." the worst thing one can do is to completely burn bridges - who knows where any of those people will wind up, who they'll talk to about you, etc.
All this, especially the large part.
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 5:11 pm
by orangeespoom
x
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Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 5:18 pm
by oinkbanana
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Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 8:37 pm
by MaxMaps
oinkbanana wrote:I've emailed them back just now
but i'm not calling, there really isn't anything to discuss.
there was one potential outstanding gig, but we were to write a new 1hour piece for it and have various guests participate (a concept I was adamantly against and it was never discussed again). we haven't been jamming anyways and there's no feasible way the gig was going to happen imho anyways.
last year I quit a band to commit myself to this one... the singer cried and had a fit.
I never, ever, never again want to see a grown man cry.
bands are headaches. back to being prolific with solo projects.
the album launch is still happening, but that's for a different band Raw Madonna (a due that's taking a sabbatical from live shows since the other guy moved across the country this summer. it's exciting that It'll be an album only project for me to work on). That artwork got finished in a "since the deadline is yesterday are you happy with this"? I took it as a sign. We've got three albums in the can, and this was going to be a double album launch... instead we're releasing just the third one. I wonder how the graphic artist is going to react when he shows up to the launch party to see I used nothing he gave me. money wasted but a lesson learned. DIY really is the way to go. always more satisfied with the results. I'll start another thread.
I remember crying when I got kicked out of my band in high school, I cried like a bitch. Turns out my band mates wanted there buddy instead of me making me feel like the outsider.
Upon playing again these last 2 years that I have not been in a project of any sort have been the most relaxing. While I have not been super aggressive in playing improvement or rushing to make anything I have had a wonderful experience getting into effects/ILF/GAS trading and buying
/ any playing at home. I will write something hopefully soon but not having to answer to any bullshit about my skills as a player and how I conduct myself as a person have been worth it to miss out playing with others on and off stage (never regretting any show I have ever played but I have had some gigs where I just wanted to pack up a leave)
The worst part about playing music is dealing with other musicians. Too me it always felt like a woman who you had great sex with on a one night stand that turns into a shitty relationship where you have days you love her and days you want to kill and leave her ass on the side of the road. (I was in Metal so you have to love having you singer strung out of coke and always short on rent for the space)
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 10:23 pm
by theactionindex
MaxMaps wrote:you have to love having you singer strung out of coke and always short on rent for the space
Replace that with drummer and bassist, and you have the last band I quit.
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 11:10 pm
by MaxMaps
theactionindex wrote:MaxMaps wrote:you have to love having you singer strung out of coke and always short on rent for the space
Replace that with drummer and bassist, and you have the last band I quit.
goddamn I hate people.
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Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2011 11:48 pm
by oinkbanana
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Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 12:22 am
by smallsnd/bigsnd
forget those steps and just treat others how you want to be treated.
regardless of anything else, bands are tough... ESPECIALLY if they are a single step past "having fun playing together!".
once you start adding shows, rehearsals, booking, transportation of gear, settlement with venues, artwork, promotion, marketing, managers, touring, record labels, lawyers, contracts, etc etc etc etc. things get tricky. :-p
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 12:32 am
by oinkbanana
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Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 1:21 am
by smallsnd/bigsnd
fair enough. if they've been that douchey, then fuck em.
Re: I quit my band - oh the relief.
Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 4:44 am
by dubkitty
i've been in bands that were really starting to happen when i realized i just coudn't go forward with that project with those people. i had to just sit down with them and tell them. they weren't happy, but since the reason was that i just wasn't able to do the stuff the other guys wanted to do--move to NYC and work the avant-garde clubs in one case, keep working the Oregon hippy circuit while i was penniless and had no place to live in the other--they understood that i had to survive.
it was less pleasant when i had to tell the guy i'd been working with for four years to develop his material that i couldn't work with him any more because he just wasn't being serious about working on the stuff any more. but i'd gone to a lot of hassle and done a tremendous amount of work to get a rhythm section for him, arranged the songs, done everything except sing his vocals and play his parts, and he totally flaked on me. it's a shame, because it would have been fabulous, but he was too timid to go for it. ces't la vie. that was when i gave up on bands. now i'm really attracted to the idea of doing an ungodly loud two-piece with guitar and drums, a sort of Durutti Column from Hell.