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Most of my dreams lately have made me wake up groggy and uncomfortable so I haven't really been putting much effort into remembering them but last night, among other things, I dreamt that I was in a department store and they were selling ovens on which you could watch things on the viewing panel, you could also change the opacity of whatever you were watching. It was Christmas time, like some full on home alone 2 shit. I sat next to a homeless guy and he was watching Skeleton Witch clips while cooking a roast chicken.

I was playing Castle of the Winds, but early on I noticed that something was wrong with the game. It was all glitchy and there were no monsters until like 8 floors down, where it went from top-down view to a sidescroller with messed up graphics.
Suddenly I was in a boss fight.
It was the Ridley fight from Super Metroid, except the entire screen was black except for us. And Ridley's sprite was a giant version of a jellyfish from the first Mario game. And I was a dude from NBA Jam...along with 3 other basketball players. It became a 4-player co-op slamjam.
So basically this Ridleyfish would shoot out fireballs that did area damage if they hit the ground, but as jammers we could grab them out of the air and dunk on Ridley's white ass for major damage.
When it was over, a dude shouted "BOOMSHAKALAKA!"
Ridleyfish died and dropped a glowing orb. It fell to the ground and a single basketball hoop appeared out of the abyss. There was a quick free for all to determine who could sink the orb into the net for bonus points. It kinda reminded me of when the sign falls at the end of a level in Sonic 3.
Then I woke up...

Achtane wrote:I was playing Castle of the Winds, but early on I noticed that something was wrong with the game. It was all glitchy and there were no monsters until like 8 floors down, where it went from top-down view to a sidescroller with messed up graphics.
Suddenly I was in a boss fight.
It was the Ridley fight from Super Metroid, except the entire screen was black except for us. And Ridley's sprite was a giant version of a jellyfish from the first Mario game. And I was a dude from NBA Jam...along with 3 other basketball players. It became a 4-player co-op slamjam.
So basically this Ridleyfish would shoot out fireballs that did area damage if they hit the ground, but as jammers we could grab them out of the air and dunk on Ridley's white ass for major damage.
When it was over, a dude shouted "BOOMSHAKALAKA!"
Ridleyfish died and dropped a glowing orb. It fell to the ground and a single basketball hoop appeared out of the abyss. There was a quick free for all to determine who could sink the orb into the net for bonus points. It kinda reminded me of when the sign falls at the end of a level in Sonic 3.
Then I woke up...

Fucking RAD

During a family outing my mother had decided that we were going to the 21st birthday party of someone I haven't seen in about a decade (in real life). It was almost monsoonal and we were driving through a neighbourhood that looked like a mix between a suburb local to me called Dianella, Seminyak in Bali and what always imagined the dodgier parts of DC would look like. We arrived at the house and it did indeed have a 21st going on for someone I knew (some jockish guy I always secretly thought was a douche, he didn't remember me) but not the correct person. I gave them the present anyway while pretending they were the correct person and explained the situation to them so I that I would be able to remove both myself and them from the awkwardness that my parents had created. Having done that we went back outside to the parking lot (the house was actually an apartment on the first floor of a complex) only to find the car was stolen. We called the police and waited for them to arrive and in the mean time my parents casually told me I was related to some Russian Orthodox mystic terrorist, like Rasputin crossed with a really jolly, fat vikiking. He was actually not Russian though but Alaskan and he was supposed to be flying in tonight. Never got the chance to meet him though because while walking down the street to the bus stop we found the car and the thieves in the alley. They promptly shot us.

I was back in high school and we were having one of those mandatory fun type field trips to the bowling alley-- I planned to forgo the bowling entirely and hang out in the shitty arcade in the basement. On the bus ride over to the alley I heard some kids in the seats in front of me talking shit about some other kids that were planning on playing one of those games that inexplicably have cash prizes called "Omega" and winning the $50,000 prize. I decide that I'll burn a dollar and see what's up with it, if for no other reason than the fact I'll have a whole other layer to add to the story later when I regale my friends at the lunch table with tales of how deluded those kids I never met were.

So we get to the bowling alley and I head down stairs to the basement arcade and discover that the basement is built like the ones that you find on 70s build houses; thick carpet, stone lined fireplace, wood panel walls, the works. There's only a few machines in there though, just a generic arcade cabinet, Omega, and a Figma vending machine somehow. I head over to Omega and it's in this perfectly rectangular cabinet with a screen (currently off), change deposit, and a bill chute for you're winnings. It's also got that hideous purple-green Who Wants to be Millionaire colour scheme. There's also a piece of paper on the side that explains it will automatically turn on when you insert your 50 cents to play.

I put in my 50 cents and the first thing that happens is the screen lights up it says, "what up fuckboy?"

It's a fucking Red-Pill / PUA quiz game.

The machine then has some stock photos of casino floor girls and cars scroll by as it explains to me that women are "bitches and whores" who are easy to manipulate "like toddlers" if you know what's up, and that the game is teach me the tricks and maybe hook me up with some dosh so I can test out my new game at the club later. I think I also got called "fuckboy" a few more times

So it's time for the fist question and some wiki-how tier art of a muscly dude with girls on his arms pops up. The announcer then says in his really douche-y voice, "Question 1: We all know that chicks dig dudes with strong jaws right?" A blue line traces the dude's chin and pulls away down to the A answer area and three variations in different colours appear in B, C, and D. "Which one of these profiles has been scientifically proven by the Mayo Clinic to be their favourite?"

At this point I get really uncomfortable and leave to stare at the contents Figma vending machine until the dream ends.

A+++ would read again

last night's dream was a "pleasant trip" by the significant other and i... we got kind of derailed and had to ask directions at a country farmhouse-type situation. the nice ol' folks invited us in for dinner, why thank you! aaaaand then they wouldn't let us go. our car disappeared. it turned into a weird guilt/blackmail/threat of violence sort of game, where they would find SOME reason to keep us there to avoid consequences.

we finally did escape, called the police from a pay phone in the middle of nowhere. they ended up bringing us "home," to that house! they just sort of dropped us off, and we booked it.... and then when someone stopped to help us (some guys in a semi?), they rolled us up in insulation and threw us on the bed of the truck.

wake up time, have a good day at work!

That's a creepy one, for sure. On Monday, I dreamt that I was leaving the house for work - as I pulled out of the garage and clicked the remote to close the door, I realized there was a toddler in the garage that I hadn't seen (a little girl in a purplish dress). I quickly opened the door again and her family rushed in to get her. She was fine, but they were incredibly angry, and by the time I reached the top of my road (which is not a long way), there were crowds of protesters gathered, shouting and carrying signs that said I was a jerk.

Then I woke up for real, and realized that I had overslept, and was going to be late for work.

Sex Dream.

BitchPudding wrote:Sex Dream.

NSFW: show

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

i demand illustrations. mspaint ones.

antennafarm wrote:

BitchPudding wrote:Sex Dream.

NSFW: show

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

i demand illustrations. mspaint ones.

I think we will leave that to Ringo.

antennafarm wrote:

BitchPudding wrote:Sex Dream.

NSFW: show

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

i demand illustrations. mspaint ones.

Ok.

A masterpiece to be sure. I think you should call it "Dream penis via probability cloud"

I was thinking "Smegma: A Love Story".

BitchPudding wrote:I was thinking "Smegma: A Love Story".

Haha, I suppose that works too.