ilovefuzz.com

bigchiefbc wrote:

brochacho wrote:I have to clean the toilets at work and I have no idea how it happens, but PEOPLE SHIT ONTO THE ACTUAL SEAT, AND I HAVE TO CLEAN THAT SHIT. HOW DO YOU MISS AND HIT THE SIDE OF THE SEAT? WHY GOD WHY

I can explain this. It's because people are afraid to sit on the seat, even if you have those disposable protector thingies. So instead of sitting on it, they squat over it. I know this, because my wife tells me that girls do this all the time.

Also people like me get drunk and do it for fun. Also its really funny to wipe your ass and stick it to the wall using the shit as an adhesive. I honestly dont know the pain of having to clean any toilet other than my own because ive always been a higher position or a manager so i jus tmake other people do it.

Achtane wrote:I just spent the past hour vacuuming termites as they came out of a hole in the wall.

HELL YEAH MOTHERFUCKER

This sounds like fun.
Your vacuum is gonna be really scary now though.

Fuzzy Picklez wrote:

Achtane wrote:I just spent the past hour vacuuming termites as they came out of a hole in the wall.

HELL YEAH MOTHERFUCKER

This sounds like fun.
Your vacuum is gonna be really scary now though.

It may start crawling.

They may start a colony in there.

THEY'LL TAKE OVER THE WORLD

SPACERITUAL wrote:

bigchiefbc wrote:

brochacho wrote:I have to clean the toilets at work and I have no idea how it happens, but PEOPLE SHIT ONTO THE ACTUAL SEAT, AND I HAVE TO CLEAN THAT SHIT. HOW DO YOU MISS AND HIT THE SIDE OF THE SEAT? WHY GOD WHY

I can explain this. It's because people are afraid to sit on the seat, even if you have those disposable protector thingies. So instead of sitting on it, they squat over it. I know this, because my wife tells me that girls do this all the time.

Also people like me get drunk and do it for fun. Also its really funny to wipe your ass and stick it to the wall using the shit as an adhesive. I honestly dont know the pain of having to clean any toilet other than my own because ive always been a higher position or a manager so i jus tmake other people do it.

Well I'm in highschool so cleaning shit up is the best job I can get at the moment.

SPACERITUAL wrote:

bigchiefbc wrote:

brochacho wrote:I have to clean the toilets at work and I have no idea how it happens, but PEOPLE SHIT ONTO THE ACTUAL SEAT, AND I HAVE TO CLEAN THAT SHIT. HOW DO YOU MISS AND HIT THE SIDE OF THE SEAT? WHY GOD WHY

I can explain this. It's because people are afraid to sit on the seat, even if you have those disposable protector thingies. So instead of sitting on it, they squat over it. I know this, because my wife tells me that girls do this all the time.

Also people like me get drunk and do it for fun. Also its really funny to wipe your ass and stick it to the wall using the shit as an adhesive. I honestly dont know the pain of having to clean any toilet other than my own because ive always been a higher position or a manager so i jus tmake other people do it.

As someone who was a custodian this statement makes me very angry.

Ordered a custom bass I've had for like a week now. The tuners won't fit in the holes. :-( I need to reamer or widen the top of the holes to push the bushings in. I JUST WANT TO PLAY THE KCUFING THING!!

Not to mention I've just missed out or been sold over on two pedals I've been GASing over all winter.

At least I got to see my favorite musicians last night.

I'm dog-/house-sitting for my older brother's wife's family for 10 days. What they DIDN'T tell me until very shortly before is that:
-the dog has stomach issues and likes to vomit on carpet very close to the hardwood but still on the carpet. they said that as long as she's fed around 8am and 5pm (which is 3 hours earlier than i usually get up, and i've been up EVERY DAY so far just to feed this bitch, and i've had to take breaks from work and drive out here just so i make sure she's fed), and she STILL pukes on the fucking carpet
-they don't have proper carpet cleaning substances in this fucking house. seriously, under the sink is littered with empty glass bottles, heavy duty pots-n-pans cleaner, and glass cleaner (multiple half-full bottles of the same stuff, yes)
-the dog is a fucking attention monger and if you stop even looking at it for a second, it gets all in your face, barks, and whines CONSTANTLY
-she's a retriever, and whenever i take her out (she has to be leashed, or else she'll run and refuse to be caught or go inside as I found out when she got out the front door), she YANKS on the leash, and i've been this close to getting knocked over from her pulling

i fucking hate this dog. and we never even wanted my brother to get married to this dumbass and her fake-ass family. pretentious, blonde, beach-going OMGers. and i'm stuck with this dog for another week.

You should fuck the dog. That'd show them.

I wrote that impulsively. Upon further review I can find no reason to or not to post it, but when in doubt, go for the lulz.

so a frat at school are all looking to jump me cause i apparently talked shit in front of this girl thats their 'friend' so she ratted on me fml i start to have a normal calm and fun semester at school then this fucking happens. this is also the same girl who was about to get her ass beat by some of my friends cause she was fucking around and trying to start shit, i stopped it because im a good person. now someone explain how my karma works

the Life Aquatic wrote:so a frat at school are all looking to jump me cause i apparently talked shit in front of this girl thats their 'friend' so she ratted on me fml i start to have a normal calm and fun semester at school then this fucking happens. this is also the same girl who was about to get her ass beat by some of my friends cause she was fucking around and trying to start shit, i stopped it because im a good person. now someone explain how my karma works

The Karma here is that they are frat jerks, and probably always will be.

well karma will be in my favor because ive basically got so many bros who will back me up, and thats not talk, this kinda shit has happened before with guys in our group and weve gone after the other dudes and made them pay lol

the Life Aquatic wrote:. now someone explain how my karma works

the Life Aquatic wrote:nd thats not talk, this kinda shit has happened before with guys in our group and weve gone after the other dudes and made them pay lol

Chances are they won't actually fight you if you act like you're game for it. In Boston everyone is a jerk and a few years back it seemed like people were picking fights with me at every other party... And none of those ever actually ended up in a fight. Not one.

It always goes like this:

[Person saying they want to fight / insults / blah blah]
You: "Ok, lets step outside though. I don't want to be a bother to anyone."
Them: "What did you say?! You want to fight me?!"
You: "Yeah, but I'd like to get back to the party pretty quick so if we could like just get to this..."
Them: "You know what? You're not worth it." [Starts to walk away, trying to act like they're still tough]
You: "Ok f#ckhead. But you let me know if you change your mind. It's fine if you need some time to work yourself up to it."

Them = Loser
You = Badass