Parenting ILF

[hbombgraphics]

My daughters (I have 3) aren't as interested in making noise like you folks, but I guess I don't have a ton of fun toys for them to play with. All I have it pedals and instruments. My oldest wanted to play the guitar, I bought here one, she never touched it. LOL. I would not get her lessons unless she actually showed interest and it didn't pan out. Not sure if I did that one wrong. Seems to be the way parenting works though. Second guessing your choices. My middle daughter has a keyboard and I actually got her a piano too. She barely touches either. LOL!! I made her a scales chart, got her tons of books (admittedly more effort than my oldest...that makes me feel bad. ), anyway, she showed interest at first, then stopped. I offered to get her lessons, she wasn't really into it. Sooooooo...hmmmm....

My youngest shows the most interest. She's five and she likes to turn my pedal knobs. She used to come downstairs with me (basement) when I'd play my bass. She doesn't do it so much anymore. It makes me sad, but I let my kids do what makes then happy. If they said "dad I want to play this or that", I try and do it assuming I could afford to.

I try to be the best dad I can. I love my girls more than anything in this world and would do anything for them.

I'll tell you something special I started for my oldest 8 years ago.

My wife and I had just had our second daughter (Addison) and I was scared my oldest (Ashlee) would feel left out by the fact that she was no longer the baby. So, when Ashlee was 4, I decided to start a special evening dedicated to just hanging out with her. We call it "camp out night" and in the beginning we actually slept in a tent in my front room, but it was her little princess tent. haha. Now Ashlee is 12 and her sister Addison is 8 (Aaliyah is 5) and we all camp out together. Every Friday night I've been camping out with my girls for the last 8 years. There is an occasional cancellation, but they are few and far between. It's a priority to me and it makes me feel closer to my girls. They look forward to it all week and ask me about it all week. Ashlee had to make a decision when Addison got a little older to let her be included, but other than that, it still has the same theme. We all sleep on the floor or in the bed together, watch a movie and go to sleep.

I get sad when I think about my daughters grown up and losing that night. Ashlee is going to be 13 this year. I'm not sure how much longer she will be interested. She's a cool kid though, so who knows. I may have a few years left with that special time with my girls, but I may not either.

I'll say this. Being a dad is the best thing I've ever done with my life.

Dude, you were probably right on the lessons thing, I had a student once that I finally asked his mom to stop paying money for him to learn, it was very obvious he never touched the instrument from the time he left the lesson until the next one. If they aren't gravitating towards it already it's a tough road, maybe she will come back to it when she is older.

I didn't know you had a teenaged daughter, we should start a support group, my daughter is 14 so sometimes we are best buds and sometimes everything i do is stupid and wrong and embarrassing.

[Kacey Y]

On the subject of sibling jealousy and the older wanting to be the baby again. Our oldest has been in love with babies since he still was one. He wanted baby dolls, would pretend to nurse them and would pat them on the back. Every single time we ever saw a baby in public, he would point and yell "Look, a baby! A baby!". He was super excited when my wife got pregnant, since then he's always referred to his little brother as "my baby". We have pictures of them together being sweet and cute right after the baby was born. There's a picture of the baby days old, with our oldest holding him in his lap and he looks more excited than anything I've ever seen. He's still super sweet and loving to his little brother, though he does sometimes get a little possessive over toys (but usually includes him after a bit of talking down). That being said, he displaced all his baby jealousy straight to US instead. Which is good, because we can take it and he's never been mean to the baby ever. He does sometimes go off on the whole thing of crawling around, trying to squeeze into baby clothes, saying "googoo gaga, I'm a baby!" and stuff like that. Which is pretty normal, I did stuff like that when my younger brother was born and I was almost twice his age.

[oldangelmidnight]

Kids love drums

True story. That kid is great.


I've lately been envying adults without children. Mine are coming up on 5 and 2 and they're a pain in the ass. At their best, their enthusiasm is overwhelming and joyful. Most of the time, though, they're screaming.
The worst is that I constantly worry that they're going to end up junkies or crazy or that they're going to end up with a lifetime of suffering due to environmental catastrophe.

But here's a cute thing I did with my daughter a couple of years ago:

[BitchPudding]

You guys are adorable.

Parenting....has not been easy for me admittedly. For many many reasons, none of them being my son or my fiancees fault.

I love my son, I really do.

The constant arm wrestle with my mind makes it hard to love anyone.


Hope your all ok. Sorry to suck the joy right out of this thread.

[BitchPudding]

In an attempt to bring some joy back: My son isnt interested in play yet, but since I've gotten into modifying my guitars and building pedals hes been SUPER interested in that side of things. I dont think he realized that you could remove stuff on guitars like that. So that was cool.

He also really likes Overwatch.

[oldangelmidnight]

I dont think he realized that you could remove stuff on guitars like that. So that was cool.

It's such a great moment to watch someone learn something like that.

[Harry_Manback]

Parenting is literally the hardest and most rewarding thing. Ever. I have three boys (16, 12, 9). My wife and I have had to deal with some serious shit with the middle one: extreme anxiety, rage, sensory issues, major behavior issues...cops at the house and issues at school. It’s nearly destroyed us (major depression).

That said, it’s funny you can absolutely hate your own child at times and it just takes a fleeting moment of pride to make it all worth while.

My two oldest boys have both been in bands through a local rock school program. The 16 year old is off the charts musically and can play pretty much anything by ear on the keyboard. He’s heavy into 80s synth sounds, it’s awesome and hilarious.

The 12 year old “asshole” is currently in a band with two super talented girls. He plays guitar and sings. The little drummer girl is a complete ripper. And the other girl does everything awesome - she’a a moody little goth girl who rocks the Docs, eyeliner and attitude.

At their last gig they covered Zombie by the Cranberries. It was SO good. We have it in video. Then Dolores died which makes watching even more bitter sweet.

They’re currently working on covers from two of my favs: Go with the Flow and Black Hole Son. I’m super stoked. And proud.

I’ve always had a very modest music room in the house and the kids have made noise from a young age. Nothing better than when your son says “Dad will you go downstairs and jam with me?”

[BitchPudding]

Man, if my son ever wants to jam with me I think id cry Id be so proud.

Id be like “yea! Pick whatever you want man! Play whatever!” Lol

[calfzilla]

Is this acceptable parenting? He keeps picking this one off the shelf... Does anyone know how hard it is to teach a one year old the three magic words??

[neonblack]

Groovy

[calfzilla]

That’s on the list too. Maybe boomstick.

[reckon luck]

We're up to 4 words now:

Mama(mamamama)
Dada(dadadada)
Nononononono
Whoa

[calfzilla]

We're up to 4 words now:

Mama(mamamama)
Dada(dadadada)
Nononononono
Whoa

We've got the first two, plus
Uh oh
Dohgdohg
Woof
Guttural sounds and table slamming for food

[BetterOffShred]

Man, if my son ever wants to jam with me I think id cry Id be so proud.

Id be like “yea! Pick whatever you want man! Play whatever!” Lol

Same. The other day he went and got out his guitar and sat on the couch with it .. I asked him if he wanted me to show him some stuff and he said not yet.. soon