The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread...



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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby odontophobia » Thu Dec 08, 2016 7:54 am

nieh wrote:About 4 years ago I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, for about 2 years I was on medication for it, but it just made me feel like a zombie. No good days, no bad days, just flat. I stopped seeing my psychologist and therapist and decided to deal with it on my own. For a couple years it was fine, and I was able to recognize my good and bad days, but the past few months have been pretty terrible. I'm used to dealing with mood swings, but these months have been different. My mood swings are becoming more frequent and a lot more intense. What makes it worse is I haven't told anyone. I don't feel like I can talk about it with anyone, even though I know it's taking a toll on people close to me. Me and my girlfriend will have the best couple of days ever, and the next morning I don't want to talk to, spend time with, or even be touched by anyone including her. I want to to tell her and explain how I've been feeling, but I just can't bring myself to do it.



Speaking as somebody with a lot of people in my life who are bi polar or suffer from depression -- it's nice to know because then you can say, "I'm having a tough day. It's not your fault. I just want to sit her a little while. Or I just want to be hugged. Or not hugged."

It's ultimately your bridge to cross. If you girlfriend is very understanding then this may be easy for her. If she's not thick skinned then it may become a battle of her thinking you should get back on your medication.

Good luck.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby snipelfritz » Thu Dec 08, 2016 9:13 am

Might not be what you want to hear, but it may be good to get back on meds for just a little while. I know the deal, eventually you will hate them again and wonder why you were taking them in the first place, but when you're in a clear rough patch, they can be a helpful tool (along with a little of the rapy) to get back to a stable point.

Soooo, we can add Greg Lake to 2016's seemingly unending list of casualties.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby popvulture » Thu Dec 08, 2016 9:30 am

Best pic of Greg Lake, or maybe anyone ever:

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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby neonblack » Thu Dec 08, 2016 11:25 am

Nieh, my dad was bipolar. On and off his meds all the time. Hated feeling like a zombie. About a year after he decided to deal with it himself, he killed himself.

Not saying that's what's going to happen to you or anyone else, but I just thought I'd share my experience. Be careful and stay healthy.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby popvulture » Thu Dec 08, 2016 11:50 am

I've had family and friends deal with it as well, and the ones who've not taken meds have had very, very rough times. I know there can be a few options to explore med-wise, so I'd say probably worth investigating. My condolences--I haven't experienced it but I know it's very hard. :hug:
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby jrfox92 » Thu Dec 08, 2016 11:55 am

:group:
Agree with a lot of these posts.
My mom's bipolar. It got so bad she had to go live with her parents/around my sister because I'm too young to take care of her and my dad. Definitely +1 on checking out some way to get back on meds or get new meds to calm things down.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby D.o.S. » Thu Dec 08, 2016 12:08 pm

:hug:
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby Disarm D'arcy » Thu Dec 08, 2016 12:10 pm

D.o.S. wrote::hug:
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby jrfox92 » Thu Dec 08, 2016 9:10 pm

Welp, I spent the last three days trying to get a hold of a customer (who I reeeaaalllly fucking hate and didn't want to accept his order but I wasn't the one that accepted it in the first place) and this motherfucker tells me I'm lying about having been attempting to call him (not to mention I even emailed him). On top of that, he then says he won't pay for, at least, two weeks and hangs up without telling me why. :mad:

Side note: if only I had the money for anger management classes.
Since I always forget:

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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby 01010111 » Fri Dec 09, 2016 7:28 pm

I just found out that I'm being let off this project at the end of the month........
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby DRodriguez » Fri Dec 09, 2016 7:43 pm

I fucking hate the holidays. My parents use it as a battle between the two of them to try and get us to see each other, my siblings are no help. It always falls on me to tell everyone no and to try and get some sort of compromise between everyone. And all I get is disappointed reactions and guilt trips from everyone. I always think about it, but this might be the last year I put all this effort into continuing everyone's delusions about the reality of the family.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby DRodriguez » Fri Dec 09, 2016 7:44 pm

wfs1234 wrote:I just found out that I'm being let off this project at the end of the month........

That's rough man, always a hard feeling. Stick it through, do damn good job through the end of the month, and start selling yourself to everyone else out there.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby Lurker13 » Fri Dec 09, 2016 8:57 pm

:group: for everyone going through hard times.

I've suffered from depression too, and OCD, which kept driving the depression. The worst part was that I felt like I couldn't talk to anyone about it because of the stigma. So, love your people and encourage them to talk to you. And yes, meds and therapy can help.
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby odontophobia » Fri Dec 09, 2016 9:02 pm

DRodriguez wrote:I fucking hate the holidays. My parents use it as a battle between the two of them to try and get us to see each other, my siblings are no help. It always falls on me to tell everyone no and to try and get some sort of compromise between everyone. And all I get is disappointed reactions and guilt trips from everyone. I always think about it, but this might be the last year I put all this effort into continuing everyone's delusions about the reality of the family.



I know invisible man can relate because he and i both have crazy mothers....

but i feel like this is my schtick every year. or, moreover, i'm the only one who will give an actual opinion to my mother while everybody else ignores her. then i take the brunt of her frustrations on like some badge of honor.

so tired of trying to dance around everybody else's lives...

:mad: :mad:
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Re: The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread

Postby Disarm D'arcy » Fri Dec 09, 2016 9:23 pm

Family obligations can get tedious. I feel petty about my concerns with mine when I hear about yours. Hang in there buddies :hug:

Willy, it's lame but I'm sure you'll find a new opportunity soon. :hug:

To everyone else, I just want to say that I read through every of your venting posts. I do not always reply, or offer more than a huggy emoji, but the heart is there. I'm always there if any of you needs to reach to another human. We have lost enough in our own internet family lately :group:
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