The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread...

[dubkitty]

tell me about it. i have a new pair of trainers that i really wanted for this weekend's last concert of the year...they arrived in Richmond at 3PM on Wednesday, but didn't leave for Charlottesville until 9 last night.

[Bassist_Diver]

So my family is huge. YUGE! And as a result we have to spread Christmas over a few days. Then three days. Now FIVE FUCKING DAYS. By the end of it our bank accounts are stressed in direct portion to our care for the holiday. So suffice it to say by the time day five rolled in I had given out of shits to give and pulled the lazy, “I only see you nuts once a year, but you’re still family and have kids so I feel pressured to give you something.” Cue gift cards for the adults and cash for the kids.

Wellll that wasn’t good enough apparently, as i just got a very angry phone call from my dad over how upset they were that I didn’t put any thought into my gifts to them. Never mind the fact that they didn’t get me or my gf/future fiancé anything and they and their kids were rude shits to everyone, apparently we’re supposed to take the high road. Next year they’ll get empty cards while I spend my time on a beach with a bottle of wine.

[Achtane]

Christmas has been fabulous ever since it's only involved my parents and my fiancee's parents/brothers.
Extended family is where holidays are ruined.

[BitchPudding]

So I guess my trade off for finally having a dope Halloween this year was to have an emotionally exhausting Holiday.

The friday before Christmas, My fiancee and I got into an argument that revealed that she felt neglected in our relationship. No love, no intimacy. Nothing. I initially thought that was bullshit, I'm juggling so much mentally that it felt like I was doing all I could do to keep our relationship healthy. After a solid hour of nothing good coming from ether of us, I have the realization that yes, I have been neglectful and passive lately. I havent been real with her about pains I had been feeling from past trauma I had been confronting slowly in therapy. We talked some more, cried, I worked, and cried again when I saw her after work. I promised to be more open with her and so far, I have.

I assumed that would be the end of it and we would be better. What I didnt count on was that whole experience of nearly losing her to be the last strain needed to break down an emotional wall I had built up from years of trauma. The saturday following this all the way to Christmas Day felt like one long blur of crying, panic and self realization. Things that I had buried in order to survive that had now become an exploded cyst.

Ultimately, it was good for me. I realized I didnt want to shut my family out of my life. I want a healthy relationship with my dad again. I want to hear his side of what went down during those fights with my mom. I want my family to be close again. I want to move on.

It just sucks that I scared the shit out of Jenny in the process. At least she says she understands. and we're ok now. I just need to keep focusing on therapy so I can heal and start planning the talks that need to be had with my parents.

It wasnt all bad ether. My boy got a switch which is easily the best console I've ever played. And my mom is getting me a J Macsis Jazzmaster for xmas. Plus I got to spoil Jenny and my son for the first time thanks to having a better pay.

So overall I'm good. Im breathing. Im still going. I survived. Now its time to heal.

[weebles]

My wife lost her job in October when her boss found out she was pregnant and pressed her on whether or not she’d be staying after baby comes. So we’ve been scraping by since then — I’ve picked up some odd jobs and she’s done a bunch of photoshoots. I even got a raise at work, but we’ve still been at a deficit each month and in 7 days we will hit a wall and the money will run out. Baby comes at the end of the month.

I. Am. Freaking. Out. Man.

I think we will pull it out after my second paycheck in January, but it’s going to be a really rough couple weeks and then the probability of the cycle repeating in February is basically guaranteed unless we stumble on some bundle of cash somewhere.

[Lurker13]

My wife lost her job in October when her boss found out she was pregnant and pressed her on whether or not she’d be staying after baby comes. So we’ve been scraping by since then — I’ve picked up some odd jobs and she’s done a bunch of photoshoots. I even got a raise at work, but we’ve still been at a deficit each month and in 7 days we will hit a wall and the money will run out. Baby comes at the end of the month.

I. Am. Freaking. Out. Man.

I think we will pull it out after my second paycheck in January, but it’s going to be a really rough couple weeks and then the probability of the cycle repeating in February is basically guaranteed unless we stumble on some bundle of cash somewhere.

That was a truly shitty thing for her boss to do. Have you talked to a lawyer about legal recourse?

[jrfox92]

That was a truly shitty thing for her boss to do. Have you talked to a lawyer about legal recourse?

Unfortunately, in Texas, you can get fired just because the boss feels like it.
I doubt her boss specifically mentioned the pregnancy as a reason, so there probably wouldn't be enough evidence for a wrongful termination or discrimination suit.

[weebles]

Yeah, what jrfox said. Also, I wasn’t really clear in the post, but she didn’t get fired. But, in my opinion, what did happen was worse because they played on her genuine desire for the organization to do well. she got talked into putting in her two weeks and having the “opportunity” to do freelance with them in the meantime, so they would be able to find someone qualified to fill her role. *Shockingly* there have been few freelance opportunities. Who knew? /s

All this being said, this is not how she sees things as having happened, but she’s a much more hopeful, positive person, as opposed to cynical bastard. But, I still think I’ve got the right perspective on this one.

[dubkitty]

cynical bastard is far more realistic than hopeful/positive. but then, i'm gonna spoil the "Hate > Love: Change My Mind" topic imma start tomorrow when i'm at work and don't have to type this shit on a busted phone screen with my right thumb.

[popvulture]

Can't wait for that thread.

[dubkitty]

jesus christ, guys...i thought my life was sucking because i was super-depressed for Christmas

[popvulture]

[Bassist_Diver]

jesus christ, guys...i thought my life was sucking because i was super-depressed for Christmas

Christmas is bullshit, my dude. But we made it through another shitty, overly-commercialized and stress-inducing holiday season. And I'm right there with you - this time of year often leaves me panicky, self-conscious, and depressed for a myriad of reasons, but I always found tearing down the Christmas decorations and restoring my home to its normal state to be very calming and therapeutic.

[dubkitty]

i'm actually feeling about 50% better today. it's possible that the 300-mile scenic drive out to West Virginia and back yesterday raised my spirits (there's little that's such a tonic to my soul as driving through beautiful country with Primal Scream, MBV, and Husker Du on the soundtrack) but it's equally possible that it's just that Christmastime is finally over.

[Bassist_Diver]