The what ever thread...

[D.o.S.]

Dubs is right on the money.

[dubkitty]

also, it's best to register with multiple agencies...the more chances you givve yourself, the better. when i was temping, i had better luck with agencies that weren't part of a chain like Kelly. and don't try to scam by not reporting your income to unemployment: they have computers and shit, and they will catch you and make you pay back the unwarranted UI. and sometimes employers use a temporary job as an on-site audition...it could turn into a permanent job.

[snipelfritz]

I guess it's more of a contract position over 3-6 months (if that's any difference between temp work?). Pay would be good actually better than my last job, but benefits not a thing I guess?

This agency reached out to me and got me an interview with the company (a major company so definitely nothing sketchy). The job isn't really in the realm I've been looking at, but wouldn't be terrible and sitting at a desk all day like my last one.

I'm going to interview with them tomorrow, so we'll just see how I feel about it then.

[Inconuucl]

We live in a world where Filthy Frank broke into the Billboard 100, damn.

This truly is the darkest timeline.

[snipelfritz]

That...I can actually get behind.

[BitchPudding]

We live in a world where Filthy Frank broke into the Billboard 100, damn.

This truly is the darkest timeline.

I think you mean the best timeline.

[snipelfritz]

Also in this timeline: I was five minutes away from home when simultaneously I get the sudden need to shit and Foreigner's Urgent comes on the radio.

[IEatCats]

Two people have tried to sell me heroin in the last two weeks, and this last time it was at my work.

Why do strangers think i do heroin? Is it because i kind of look like kurt cobain when i dont do my face???

[Disarm D'arcy]

Maybe they're just really bad at targeted marketing?

[Invisible Man]

Also in this timeline: I was five minutes away from home when simultaneously I get the sudden need to shit and Foreigner's Urgent comes on the radio.

Chicken or egg, bro? Chicken or fuckin egg?

[Invisible Man]

Two people have tried to sell me heroin in the last two weeks, and this last time it was at my work.

Why do strangers think i do heroin? Is it because i kind of look like kurt cobain when i dont do my face???

IEC: last heroin sales meeting I attended, there was a big push to target Cobainers (what we call them in the industry), so you're just feeling the effects of corporate's latest initiative.

EDIT: Buffalo...was it in the Village? It was in the Village.

[odontophobia]

Two people have tried to sell me heroin in the last two weeks, and this last time it was at my work.

Why do strangers think i do heroin? Is it because i kind of look like kurt cobain when i dont do my face???

I've only been drug solicited twice.

Once in Tarifa, Spain. Some young kids passed us in an alley and asked if we wanted to buy hash. Weird because we definitely weren't dressed looking like we wanted to buy hash.

The other time was at work. This guys phone didn't get activated so I had to call and get it activated. He was smelling like he just crawled out of your local Stem/Seeds/Sticks removal. After I activated his phone he wanted me to call it to test it out. Not being a dolt I used one of our works phones. After the call went through he said, "now you can call me when you need some cologne that smell good."

Fucking idiot lived at a college town an hour away. Broh I'm not calling you to get me some weed when you love an hour away. Wtf.

[bloatedsack]

Also in this timeline: I was five minutes away from home when simultaneously I get the sudden need to shit and Foreigner's Urgent comes on the radio.

When i was a little boy I had to walk to my little league fields, it was maybe two miles from my house? Mile and a half? Something like that. Anyways,t his was in the time of dinosaurs, when children could walk to places without parents, unattended.

So, I'm like halfway there and I have to suddenly shit. Like Quatto is angry, and the cramps are there and the overwhelming massive shit is welling inside you. So, I know I'm not going to make it, so I turn around and start heading back to my house (it's closer, adn even at like 9 years old I knew that public restrooms were gross).

Well, it's clear I'm not going to make it. I'm not even going to make it bqack to my friend's house which is significatnly closer, its gonna go down now. So, I'm in the middle of the suburbs, y'know, there's houses everywhere and lots of cars and WTF am I going to do?

I get smart. I ditch into a drainage culvert I'm about to cross and slip under the bridge that is over it, pull down my shorts and unleash this massive, stinking foetid mess. My ass is like a softserv machien from hell, it's one constant long incredibly filthy creamy log, and I'm squatting under a bridge like a hobo just droppign this nightmare.

Well, I finish, and clean up s best I can adn then high tail it for duder's house where I can vacate anything left and clean up. Behind me, just under teh bridge, is this perfect little pile of feces. Like that fucking emoji the kids all buy toys of. Round and sort of pyramidal and spiralling up with a perfect little curled whip top.

Admittedly, this is like 35 years ago, I may be embellishing the photogenical-ness of this turd. Or not.

So, I'm at duder's house cleaning up, and then I go back to complete my trip to little league. As I'm crossing this fucking bridge again, there's like 10 little fucking kids all just dancing around in the culvert where I jsut got done defiling mother earth, and I look down and ask, "What's going on?"

And with fucking eyes like saucers they say, "You should see the size of this dog's poop! It' must've been huge."

And lo, these children were in fucking awe of my product. ALmost like a fucking cargo cult of feces. They were in awe, poking it with sticks and fucking giddy.

I didn't tell them it was mine.

I sucked at baseball.

In other news, for over 30 years I've harboured a crush on the redheaded chick from Iron Maiden's "Women in Uniform" video:

NSFW: show

[aedes]

Quatto is angry

[Disarm D'arcy]

Poop chick fella hehe