Achtane wrote:I was thinking tonight at work that there should definitely be a porn based on the Johnny Cash song, "The Legend of John Henry's Hammer".
Even if there's already a porno version of the story. There might well be.
Like, the setup could be that there's this BBW so, uh, BB that no man is capable of satiating her hambeast lust. Every man on the line has attempted to push his way through her massive folds, to no avail. But of course our man John with his massive BBC "hammer" appears. This is where they can use lyrics directly from the song:
"Swing that hammer down three times
Pay you a nickel a day for every inch you sink it to"
And so on, at opportune moments.
So John's making good progress but then this big boss man comes in to totally cuck him with a steam drill...drilldo. He's all "You so high and mighty with all them muscles, boy, but you 'bout through. This steam drill(do)'s gonna take a little vinegar outta you,"
Then the DP man-machine fuck contest begins. We're really going for a lot of fetishes at once, here. It turns into a public fuck-off. "Two thousand people hollered 'go, John Henry'" and shit gets insanely acrobatic. Eventually the drilldo blows up from sheer friction as the wo-mountain utters a horrible sigh and John Henry emerges victorious. However, as we know, his heart just couldn't take the strain. He fucked himself to death. But every hopeful amateur porn producer makes a pilgrimage to his grave in hopes that it will bring them good fortune.
"You sure was a hammer swinger."
The end.
Feel free to PayPal me $10k for the rights to this production.
Being a Johnny Cash fan I'm appalled. Being a BBW porno fan I'm intrigued. Awesome concept I'd watch it except for the BBC aspect. I'm not racist, they just make me feel........inadequate.
