Got some new kit, set it all up, and worked the kinks out. It took me 12 hours (effing usb drivers) but it was so worth it.
FUCK YES.
Board chain: Mooer Shimverb > Green Muff > Stanimal modded Hyperion > DE Bass Fuzz > Stanimal built Magnus Modulus > EB vol > Freeze > SMMH > M9 > Muza FD900 > BF-2 > interface > (laptop running Ableton and Reason, with APC20 attached) > amp.